gym day 1

after 10 years, give or take a year or two, i stepped unwillingly into a gym again today. skinny as i was then and incredibly self conscious about it, i was terrified of the intense machismo and embarrassed by the unabashed narcissism that the space indulges and encourages. at that time, my shyness , and i must admit- laziness, kept me going for less than a month. my company being rohit and john – off and on. but now, with my back absolutely killing me with all the driving and a general feeling of anxiety regarding my health ( i might be getting prone to the habitual hypochondria of an old man), i took the plunge into the testosterone heavy air of the local gym) and today was different. perhaps i have grown so much older than the instructors that they don’t threaten me anymore. their jokiness extends the relationship to an odd sort of camaraderie, their winks and pats border on an amused flirtation. middle aged women sweat away in between the black foam clad machines, black rubber and plastic move in arcs and circles, tough young men wince in front of the mirrors at their bodies- pulling in their stomachs and pumping iron, older potbellied bodies sweat profusely making dark stains on t-shirts, legs move in rhythms reflected and re-reflected in an endless corridor. a skinny young boy with gold dyed hair and a earring wearing blue rexene sweatpants and a black and yellow striped t-shirt looked adoringly around at the bodies of the men, each of whom he yearned to become. today was cardio day. as i walked on a rolling rubber mat heading nowhere i looked out at the parked motorcycles and two wheelers leaning against the trees and the evening walkers- hand in hand or shopping bags in tow.